Have I told you lately?

Have I thanked all you lovely readers lately?

Hee hee...sorry. I know I'm vain, but really I'm just trying to figure out ways to use this iSight besides as a paperweight. I didn't realize with iMovie 3.0 (or whatever) you can make short movies with it. Now I just gotta find interesting subject matter.

I'm going home this weekend to see my sister and family. Sis has officially been in Godville for a year and her "sentence" is up this Friday when she "graduates". She's staying on for another 6 months and going to school (hopefully). But the required time is over.

She said she's been having nightmares all week that show her not coming back or coming home and loading up on drugs again. She said they prayed for her because she was under spiritual warfare. Yea, I don't really believe in the Bible, but I do believe your consciousness can fuck with you. And I feel for her having to go through that. Although I'm excited as hell to see her, her being home an entire week without me constantly babysitting her freaks me out. A big part of me wishes she'd just stay in that safe haven for the next 15 years. 15 years...yea, that might be enough time to not worry about her going back to sticking junk in her veins.

Tomorrow my mom is getting surgery too. Tense week for my family. The scary part is her blood pressure has been up really high all week. Some good news is that her cancer is still in remission, so she says. The bad part about my mom is that I never feel like I'm getting the whole story. I just hope that's true about her cancer. As much as my mom drives me nuts, I'd be lost without her, without our weekly phone calls. Hmm, that reminded me of one of the scariest moments of my life. I was doing dishes and my mom was sitting at the kitchen table. I was probably 16-17 and way taller than my mom so I could see over her head. I looked back to ask her something and I noticed she was balding from chemo on the top of her scalp. I didn't even know she was doing chemo, that's how much my mom hates to worry us. She still worked full time, took care of us and underwent chemotherapy without our support.

She's crazy on occasion, but god damn she's strong.

So yea, big family weekend and I can't wait. Did you know it's officially fall today? That is sorta sad and sorta exciting. Exciting because well, as you know, it's almost Halloween, my anniversary plus fall is my absolute favorite season. As a bonus, a Halloween store is opening in my work building!!! Sad, well because I'm not ready to give up all the outside good times. My friends are going back to school and busy and it will snow in a few months. And snow in Chicago = major suckage.

But I will say, damn this was an excellent summer. Best in a long time mostly because I am surrounded by people I love.

Hmmmm, I've been realizing lately that this blog keeps me sane. It's so good to have somewhere to unload sometimes. So thanx for reading.