Hear that? That's my uterus asking me when it's needed?

One of my best friends is pregnant. Thankfully she keeps me updated on everything, all the lovely details, because like the information whore I am, I gotta know!!

She believes she may have felt the baby move last week. And that makes me feel like a big ol' puddle of girl. I'm just amazed. Even though I know babies happen every day, it doesn't happen everyday to my friends.

When she wrote that her baby is the size of her outstretched hand I immediately took my hand and placed it on my belly to judge. My god...that's huge. And again with the girl puddles and amazement.....

So I feel like since she has been giving me all manner of details from cervical mucous to breast tenderness, I should make a public confession as well. Even though I fear I may be labeled a total nut job. Here goes: I'm obessed with the birthing process and/or pregnancy. I religiously watch shows on it on TV, even recording them with our Replay to watch on the weekends. And when I watch these shows, I tear up. I read "What to Expect" when my girlfriends started reading it so I'd know what they were going through. I even check some baby blogs daily to keep in the know. I don't even flinch when I see the birth carnage coming out of the "gore tunnel" of complete strangers on TV. It's a disease, I understand.

However, I should state, I do not want kids of my own right now....not for at least another few years. I just want all of my friends to have 100 of them so I can spoil them, squeeze them and smell them at regular intervals.

Of course, I could also go into the medical field so I could be around labor constantly, however, the thought of having stranger's hoo-has in my general direction all day and night frightens me. For some reason I can watch stranger's hoo-has on porn, but not in living color.

My husband thinks I'm insane. I'll make sure he's engrossed in the computer room before I'll curl up on the couch at the opposite end of the house for some baby show time. He'll come in and see me with tears in my eyes and a screaming kid on the screen and just roll his eyes. I am insane, it's not news to me. And when my friend has her baby, I'll bawl then too.

Whew, I feel better. Confessions are healthy, no?

Now back to your regularly scheduled program of Anti-Bush, rants and porn.