Mixed Emotions

My sister is going to leave tomorrow afternoon after a nice, long, fun visit. And mostly I'm sad. I can feel it behind my eyes and in my heart that I'm going to bawl when we drive away. She's back to the sister I missed and loved that was hidden underneath scary narcotics, lies and a life of crime. I'm not ready to give up seeing her everyday yet.

I'm fiercely protective of her too. And going back to Godville, although it's safe for her as far as not being around drugs, is strict and militant and not a religion I believe is helpful for anything other than making someone who was unresponsible follow strict rules.

I suppose there are selfish reasons for wanting her here too. I'm proud of her. I like showing her off to my friends because she's hilarious, pretty, silly and fun. She's tough too, I suppose maybe she's the things I wish I was more of. She also makes me feel 100% normal in the way I think and act. We may not look anything alike but I believe we think alike. We definitely have the same sense of humor.

You've forgiven me for the lack of Daily Pix, so please forgive me if I need to tear up a little for a few days. I already miss her.