My baby does the hanky panky

It's now 2:46 a.m. on Monday (or well now Tuesday) and I can't sleep. After eating my 5 points worth of Weight Watchers approved dinner and 3 points worth of dessert, I cuddled up in bed with my man and my dog and promptly passed out at 7:30 p.m. last night watching video podcasts about photography.

The night before his knee surgery where I was hoping to seduce him into a frenzy of awkward but passionate nookie while carefully not touching his knee or really moving him at all because of the pain he's in. But no, my fat ass decides to pass out in bed because the Smart Ones 3 Point Ice Cream dessert was just too much of a shock to my system. So fast forward and here I am. I woke up at 1:00 a.m. to him finishing Hell Boy next to me. He passed out and I finished it and well, now here I sit.

Managed to down my water for the day (66 oz.) and update my WW tracker AND read all of People Magazine's feature of "Half Their Size!" I've also started reading the big book of bathroom knowledge sitting on our toilet and paced around our apartment for 35 minutes.

Really though, it's all a mask for being nervous for his surgery. We have to be there in 9 hours. Putting him out and working on him while I wait in a room by myself tomorrow....yea, I'm not good at this.

I keep laying in bed tonight with theMan next to me curled around the dog and I'm thinking: You go day by day getting used to the people you love laying next to you in bed or meeting you at the train after work to come home, and even helpful things like to take out the dog or to help you bring in the groceries. And more than chores, you rely on the warmth of their hug after a long day or how they know exactly what kind of cheese you love best. A person who you've memorized without realizing it the exact smell of their neck. Their shoe size and where they always leave their keys and cell phone. How they like to spend weekend mornings in bed with limbs intertwined. What kind of soap they use and how they take their coffee.

And as I'm sitting here in the middle of the night, freaking out, I realize I never ever want to take those things for granted.